#HEYGRRRLFRENNNS February is here, which means it’s officially Black History Month, and let me tell you—this year, we are reclaiming our time. Literally. Because we deserve it. The revolution might not be televised, but it will be RESTED, and if anybody asks why you’re on your couch, chillin out max and relaxin all cool, sipping something warm and ignoring your to-do list, just hit ‘em with, “Because I CAN!” And honestly? They did. Let’s be real—our people have been working since forever, and I don’t just mean the 9-to-5 hustle. I mean generations of back-breaking labor, unpaid caregiving, fighting, building, fixing, creating, and saving everybody but ourselves. We were taught that strength means pushing through exhaustion, that success means never slowing down, and that being worthy means being productive. But guess what? That’s a scam. A bold-faced lie. A hustle culture pyramid scheme designed to keep us too tired to even think about joy, let alone experience it. This year, I’m declaring REST as a radical act. I’m talking about doing nothing on purpose. Not as a reward. Not as a ‘quick break’ before diving back into the grind. Just because you can. Because you should. Because our bodies, minds, and spirits were never meant to be treated like rechargeable batteries for capitalism.

The truth is, Black rest is reparations, and every nap, every deep breath, every moment of peace we claim is us rewriting the rules. At the risk of sounding too radical, the “American dream” needs some tweaks, because I have never in my life dreamed of working. So, let’s get one thing straight—rest is not laziness, and slowing down is not failure. The idea that we have to earn rest is just another way we’ve been conditioned to put ourselves last. And don’t get me wrong, I know the struggle. That little voice in your head that whispers, “You should be doing something productive,” the guilt that creeps in when you’re not crossing something off your never-ending to-do list—it’s real. But here’s the thing: that guilt is not yours to carry. It’s inherited, passed down from generations who never had the privilege of slowing down. But we do. And if we want to honor their sacrifices, we have to unlearn the lie that our worth is tied to our output. So this week, we’re diving deep into the art of doing absolutely nothing—on purpose. No guilt, no productivity hacks, no “but let me just check this one email real quick” nonsense. Just real, unapologetic rest.

Booked and Busy

Let’s start with the obvious—rest is not something you squeeze in when you have time. It’s something you make time for. You wouldn’t cancel on your boss, your bestie, or even that random dentist appointment you forgot you scheduled six months ago (and now they’re charging you for a missed visit). So why do we treat our own rest like an afterthought? Imagine if you gave your downtime the same level of respect as a work meeting. Imagine if “I need a nap” was a valid excuse, just like “I have a Zoom call.” Spoiler alert: it is. In fact, let’s take it a step further—what if you started scheduling your rest the same way you schedule everything else? That means putting “do absolutely nothing” in your calendar and protecting that time like it’s Beyoncé tickets. Because here’s the truth: if you don’t make time for rest, the world will not make it for you. And last I checked, the world has been running Black folks ragged for centuries. It’s time to flip the script. And before you hit me with the, “But grrrl, I have things to do!”—I hear you. Responsibilities are real. Bills are real. Life does not pause just because we want to lay down. But tell me this: how is pushing yourself to exhaustion helping you? How is running on fumes making you better at anything? Be honest. The last time you forced yourself to “power through,” did you actually do your best work, or were you just moving on autopilot, counting down the minutes until you could crash? Rest isn’t just for the moments when you have nothing left—it’s supposed to be a consistent part of your life, something that fuels you before you hit empty. You cannot pour from an empty cup, and you definitely cannot keep refilling it with nothing but stress, caffeine, and vibes.

Guilty Pleasure

The problem is, we’ve been conditioned to feel guilty for resting, as if doing nothing is a moral failing. Black women especially have been taught that we have to be strong all the time, that we have to be the ones holding everything together, making sure everyone else is good before we even think about sitting down. But let’s talk about who benefits from that mindset—because it sure isn’t us. The expectation that we have to be superheroes 24/7 is exhausting, and I don’t know about you, but I am not trying to be anybody’s emotional support human while running on five hours of sleep and half a sip of coffee. The truth is, we do not owe our labor, our energy, or our presence to anyone, and we definitely don’t owe it to faceless corporations who will continue to make billions of dollars off of us whether we got our beauty sleep or not. And let’s talk about the types of rest, because some of y’all think just sitting down for five minutes between tasks counts, and I’m here to lovingly say: Be so serious right now. There is physical rest—yes, actual naps—but also emotional rest, where you give yourself permission to not carry every single burden. There’s creative rest, where you stop forcing yourself to produce and just exist. And let’s not forget social rest, which means not answering texts immediately, declining that invite, and enjoying the peace of your own company. Every time you let yourself rest in any of these ways, you are rejecting the belief that your value is tied to how much you can give. You are reclaiming time that was never meant to be stolen from you in the first place.

Romanticize Your Rest

We talk a lot about the soft life these days—romanticizing ease, luxury, and moving through life without unnecessary struggle. And I love that for us, I really do. But let’s be real: rest isn’t just about bubble baths and silk robes (although, 10/10 recommend both). It’s deeper than that. Rest is sacred. It is a declaration that you will not be drained, depleted, or distracted from the life you actually want to live. It is a commitment to protecting your peace, your body, and your spirit from anything—or anyone—who believes you should sacrifice yourself for the sake of productivity. And if the thought of resting still makes you feel uneasy, ask yourself this: Who taught you that being exhausted was a virtue? Who made you believe that your worth is measured by how much you do instead of who you are? Black women deserve softness. Not just in aesthetics, but in our actual existence. We deserve to move through the world without constantly proving our value, justifying our rest, or apologizing for needing a break. We are the blueprint for culture, for innovation, for resilience. We are the moment, and the moment deserves to be well-rested. So, what does it look like to truly embrace rest as something sacred? It means setting boundaries like they’re law. It means unsubscribing from stress, politely (or not-so-politely) declining anything that drains you, and rejecting the idea that suffering is a prerequisite for success. It means choosing rest even when your to-do list is screaming at you. It means understanding that you do not need to burn yourself out to prove that you’re worthy of the good things in life. You already are. You always have been.

At the end of the day, grrrlfren, you don’t need permission to rest—but if you’ve been waiting for a sign, this is it. You are allowed to exist without constantly proving your worth. You are allowed to slow down, to pause, to unplug. You are allowed to take up space in this world without exhaustion being the price of admission. Rest is not something you have to earn, and it is definitely not something you should feel guilty about. It is your birthright. Your reclamation. Your reparations. This week, this month, this life—give yourself permission to rest without guilt. Block the calls, mute the emails, let the world spin without you for a minute. You are not falling behind. You are not being lazy. You are restoring yourself, and that is the most radical, most powerful thing you could possibly do.Also, if you’re still feeling guilty about resting, let me put it like this—you are not breaking generational curses just to be tired. You are not out here healing, growing, and evolving just to run yourself into the ground. You deserve to be here, rested and whole, fully in your body and fully in your joy. And the next time you even think about overextending yourself when you’re running on empty, I want you to remember this: Rest is your right, not a privilege. Take all of it. Now go and be great, you lil grrrly pop! TTYL!