#HEYGRRRLFRENNNS this time of year always comes with pressure to reinvent yourself. Spring rolls in and suddenly the whole internet is in its reset era. Spring cleaning, spring glow-ups, spring hustle. And while the energy is cute, it can also feel like a lot. Like, what if I’m not blooming on schedule? What if I’m just trying to make it through the day without spiraling? It’s giving seasonal confusion. We get sold this narrative that spring is when we’re supposed to come alive again. Shake off the dust, set the goals, start fresh, and hit the ground running. But some of us are still thawing out. Still regrouping. Still figuring out what we even want from this next chapter. And honestly? That’s okay. You’re allowed to be in your “I don’t know yet” phase. You’re allowed to be moving slow. You’re allowed to be growing in ways that no one else can see yet. Everything doesn’t have to be blooming in public for it to be valid. The pressure to bloom on command is just another way perfectionism tries to sneak back in. You don’t owe anybody a dramatic comeback or a perfectly timed transformation. Sometimes growth looks like setting boundaries. Sometimes it looks like rest. Sometimes it looks like making it through the week without giving up on yourself. Even that is something to be proud of.

This blog post is for the grrrls who are growing off the grid. The ones who are making real changes but not broadcasting it. The ones who are healing in private, setting boundaries behind the scenes, and choosing themselves in ways that might not be loud or visible but are still powerful. You do not need a big announcement or a rebrand to prove you are evolving. You are allowed to bloom quietly. You are allowed to protect your peace while you figure things out. Spring is not just about starting over. It is also about softening into the version of you that has been slowly taking shape this whole time. You do not need permission to be a work in progress. You do not need to have a five-step plan or aesthetic Pinterest board to back up your growth. You just need to stay close to what feels real. The pressure to rush your healing or speed through your journey just to look productive is the exact thing keeping you stuck. Every flower has her own schedule. The moment you let that go is the moment things start to click into place.

It’s Photosynthesize, Not a Marathon

It’s wild how we’re expected to constantly “level up” without ever slowing down. That pressure didn’t come from nowhere. We live in a world that rewards constant output. Hustle culture told us that if you’re not improving, you’re falling off. Social media told us every season should come with a transformation. Capitalism told us our worth is tied to how productive we are. And if you’re a Black grrrl, the pressure gets even louder. You’re expected to be strong, resilient, glowing, healing, and slaying all at once. Like can I live?? None of this is about personal failure. It’s about how we’ve been conditioned. When you grow up in systems that treat rest as laziness and silence as failure, it makes sense that you feel weird for not “doing enough” all the time. But the truth is, real growth doesn’t always come with receipts. Sometimes you are changing in ways that have nothing to do with goals or outcomes. Sometimes you are just becoming softer, safer, more aware. That counts. The problem is, we’re rarely told that internal growth is just as powerful as external success. You don’t get a round of applause for choosing rest over burnout or walking away from something that used to define you. But those quiet moments are the ones that actually matter. That’s where the real blooming starts. You don’t need to force a season of transformation just because the world says it’s time. If your spring looks like recovery, reflection, or just surviving what winter left behind, that is valid. You are still growing. You are still in motion. You are still allowed to be proud of yourself. And if you’re not sure what you’re working toward right now? That’s okay too. There’s nothing wrong with being in between goals, in between versions of yourself, or in between plans. That space is still sacred.

No Timeline, Just Vibes

There is so much pressure to hurry, but where exactly are we rushing to? And who decided that growth needs a deadline? That pressure didn’t start with us. It comes from living in a world where productivity is currency. It’s easy to internalize that and start thinking you’re behind just because your journey doesn’t have a pretty before-and-after moment. But the truth is, growth is not a race. So many of us feel like we’re doing something wrong because our progress isn’t linear. But that’s the setup. You’re not supposed to feel like you’re winning all the time. Growth can be boring. It can be annoying. It can be low-key heartbreaking. You’ll outgrow things you thought you’d always love. You’ll miss versions of yourself that weren’t even good for you. You’ll have moments where you’re like, “Am I even making progress?” And yes. Yes you are. Even when it’s quiet. Especially when it’s quiet. This whole idea that you need to make major moves by spring or have your life on a vision board trajectory is cute in theory, but not sustainable. Not everybody is in bloom right now. And nobody is in bloom all the time. Your growth might be happening in ways that are slower, softer, or more internal than what you expected—and that doesn’t make it any less valid. There’s also a layer of this that’s cultural. Black grrrls especially are expected to constantly overcome and then turn that struggle into some kind of inspirational story. We’re not just allowed to be. We’re expected to thrive, glow, teach, and inspire, even when we’re still healing. But you do not have to turn your journey into content. I just happen to be a radical self-care enthusiast. With the gift of gab! Let your growth be for you. Let it be slow. Let it be weird. Let it make no sense to anyone except the version of you that’s finally learning how to rest, say no, or just enjoy where she is without guilt. The more you stop trying to rush to some imaginary finish line, the more space you give yourself to actually feel the progress.

Grow Anyway

Even when the timing feels off. Even when nobody’s watching. Even when it seems like everyone else is ahead. Grow anyway. Because so much of what makes growth real is how it shows up when no one is clapping. And honestly, some of your biggest breakthroughs will come from the seasons where nothing looks special on the outside. Main character energy! It’s easy to feel stuck when you don’t have a clear milestone to point to. But part of what makes growth powerful is how it shifts you internally. Maybe you’re not shouting about your healing journey, but you’re pausing before reacting. Maybe you’re not quitting your job or moving across the country, but you’re finally saying no without over explaining. Those shifts count. Those shifts are you blooming. We’re not all meant to bloom in the same way. Some of us need more sunlight. Some of us take our time. And some of us are deep in our root era, building strength underground before we make a move. That’s not failure. That’s wisdom. That’s you honoring your process instead of rushing it to keep up with someone else’s highlight reel. You don’t owe transformation to anybody but yourself. Your growth doesn’t have to be digestible, aesthetic, or productive. It just has to feel like you’re becoming more honest, more whole, more at peace. Some seasons are for planting. Some are for pruning. Some are for blooming. You get to choose what this one is for. Let people think you’re not doing much. Let them think you’re being quiet or lowkey or chill. Let them underestimate how powerful it is to slow down and get clear. You’re not falling behind. You’re growing on purpose. And no, you don’t need to explain it to anyone.

You do not need a perfect plan, a dramatic glow-up, or external validation to prove that you are growing. You just need to keep choosing yourself, even when it’s quiet. Even when it’s slow. Even when it’s messy. That’s growth. That’s the kind that lasts. It is easy to believe that progress only counts if it’s visible. That if you are not constantly announcing your wins, you must not be doing anything worth celebrating. But the reality is, some of the most powerful growth happens when no one is watching. It happens in the pause between decisions. It happens in the moments where you choose to do things differently than you would have last year, last month, or even last week. And no one needs to see that for it to matter. Let this be the season where you stop rushing your process. Let this be the season where you stop asking for permission to take your time. You do not need to explain your pace, your timing, or your journey to anyone. You are allowed to protect your peace while you figure it out. You are allowed to shift your priorities, change your mind, or take a step back to get grounded. That’s not a setback. That’s self-awareness. The kind of growth that lasts and that actually changes you is slow, layered, and deeply personal. It is not built for public consumption. It is not built for validation. It is built for you. And the more you let go of the need to “arrive,” the more you create space to evolve without pressure. Now go and be great, you lil grrrly pop! TTYL!