#HEYGRRRLFRENNNS Congratulations to all my grrrlies in the building! We have officially hit EIGHT consistent months of restarting our radical self-care journey together, which is soo exciting because we can officially say that we ATE!! We have been putting soo much hard work into showing up for ourselves, lifting each other up, and building this community where it is safe for all the grrrls to burn their bras, take off their wigs and to just be themselves! If someone told me eight months ago I would be spilling all of my personal business on the internet for the sake of grrrlkind, I would have told them to literally get real but that’s the thing about social media, it’s become as essential to our daily routine as taking a picture of your food before you eat it. Listen, I’ll be honest, If you dropped me off in the middle of the rainforest and took my phone away from me I for sure wouldn’t make it! For context, I’m geographically challenged so I’m not kidding when I say I NEED my phone and also I need grrrl talk to survive so I have no choice but to be brave and put the social in social media. 

Just because I have a relationship with social media, doesn’t mean that she doesn’t get on my last nerves. Social media is bittersweet, like when your grandma offers you a candy out of her purse. On one hand you’re excited for the treat but thinking about the expiration date is scary! Social media can be entertaining, and even informative but sometimes it feels like a full-time job just to keep up with it all. And I’m literally just a grrrl! It’s like there is this unspoken pressure to make sure you look like a Victoria’s Secret angel before you even THINK about picking up your phone and sharing your life online. Last time I checked, this is RIHANNA’S good internet, and being a model isn’t a prerequisite for having a little fun. Which brings me to my lil anniversary present from me to you! I sat down with social media specialist and certified grrrly pop Miya Ingram to talk about how to make your digital debut without losing your authenticity (or your mind). If you are not quite ready to be thrust into the social media spotlight, don’t worry because we’ll talk about how to set boundaries with the content you consume! Ready to get into it? Let’s go!

Your Grid, Your Rules

The first step to feel comfortable taking ownership of your social media is to take the idea of posting off of a pedestal because there is nothing to be scared of! Your profile is just your little corner of cyber space to do whatever you want with, think of it like buying a house. If you want to put your feet on the coffee table, or drink straight from the juice container you can! Granted, if you have roomies its not the most considerable action to take, but in this scenario you have just purchased your dream home. If that still includes sharing the bills there better be a diamond ring somewhere in the picture too. They’re a grrrls bestfriend! The point is that you are completely in control of your space, so feel free to make it your own! Just like you can decorate your house any way you want to, you can also customize your grid to be the right fit for how you want to show up online. Finding your flow can take time, but there is no time limit. This should be a fun process like when the main character of a romcom makes their room all messy doing multiple outfit changes. You’ll be so focused on doing you that you won’t even notice the time pass! Also, and this is very important for you to understand, you have the right to take up space. We can’t let the opinions from your kinda sorta friends, coworkers, and acquaintances from eight years ago determine how you decide to live your life online. You are not the same grrrl you were then, and technically speaking not the same grrrl from 5 minutes ago! (Because biology… chemistry? physics?) As long as you are not harming yourself or others, allow yourself the grace and space to evolve, grow, and express yourself because you won’t regret it! Miya says, It’s okay to experiment with content that might seem a bit different from your usual style, and if something doesn’t work, you can always delete it! Embrace the process of trial and error as you refine your approach. Don’t be afraid to try new things and learn as you go—it’s all part of finding what works best for you.

Flipping The Script

We have all felt it, we are scrolling on our phones enjoying a mix of funny videos, this seasons fashion inspirations, and cooking tutorials we’ll never use, and BOOM! Out of nowhere we see a post that makes us question our entire existence. Buzz kill. Suddenly, we have no direction in life, nothing we have is good enough, and we are ready to spend the rest of our lives under a rock like our first name is Patrick and our last name is Star. Comparison is the thief of joy grrrls, but it’s human nature so we need to come up with realistic ways to make it suck a little less! The first step to doing this is to remember to put things into perspective and try our best not to assume. You know what they say about assuming, when you assume you make up with the worst case scenario and immediately start crying. A lot of what we see online is carefully curated to show the highlights, not the full picture. The reality is that behind every perfectly staged photo or viral video, there’s a lot that we don’t see like the struggles, the self-doubt, and the inescapable bad hair day or two. The second and most life changing step is to unfollow accounts that make you feel less than or that push a narrative that doesn’t resonate with you. Instead, fill your feed with content that inspires you, whether it’s that really cool new radical self-care blog or even just pages that make you laugh out loud. Curating your feed with positivity and inspiration will make your online space one where you feel uplifted, not drained. Miya explains that following pages that align with your goals or your genuine interests will actually configure your algorithm to show related content, which means even more good vibes for the grid!

All About #Balance

Social media is 24/7, but that doesn’t mean you have to be. It’s easy to fall into the trap of feeling like you need to be constantly connected, constantly posting, and constantly engaging. But here’s the truth: you’re allowed to step back. In fact, setting boundaries with your online presence is essential for maintaining your mental, physical, and emotional health. Decide when you’re going to be online, and when you’re not. Don’t feel guilty for taking a social media detox when you need it. There is life outside of trending audios, tiktok dances, and viral videos. I am the farthest thing from an outdoorsy grrrl, so sometimes I need a not so gentle reminder that sunshine exists and is completely free to enjoy. Fresh air anyone? You are not made of pixels, you are made of sugar, spice, and everything nice, which means that your life is not happening within the confines of your social media page. You have to find a balance between the digital world and reality, which can look like scheduling ‘offline’ times for yourself. Whether it’s a few hours in the evening or an entire weekend (you brave, brave grrrl) you can use this time to recharge, reflect, and focus on what really matters. If curating the perfect social page is really what makes your heart flutter and your toes tingle think of it as time to be inspired to create more content. The point is that digital self-care isn’t selfish, it’s necessary. You know yourself best, when you are starting to spiral about something you’ve seen on social media take a moment to place your focus back to where your feet are and ground yourself in the real world. Then whenever you come back to social media, you’ll be able to show up as your best, most authentic self. Miya says features like muting or notification control work wonders for creating boundaries and practicing digital self-care. It allows you to curate what you see and feel more in control over your relationship with your phone.

Social media doesn’t have to be just a sea of strangers, it can be your gateway to finding your people! Connecting with a community that uplifts and empowers you is a complete game changer. Imagine scrolling through your feed and seeing familiar faces who actually care about what you have to say, resonate with your journey, and understand what it’s like being a grrrl. The struggle is real! I am still trying to control my heart rate and anxiety around the idea of putting myself out there online, but honestly connecting with you all makes it worth it. I feel like every time I push myself to show a little more of my personality the more you grrrls show me that it’s safe to be myself. So whether it’s a virtual hobbies club, a wellness group, or a roll for sandwich account, finding your tribe where you feel seen and heard could be another great way to start feeling comfortable with the idea of socializing online. Explore different communities and don’t hesitate to reach out to those that inspire you. You are worthy of being a part of a group that ignites your passion and encourages you to live life authentically. If you can’t find the right space, that might also be the sign you’ve been waiting for to create one! If you want more advice on how to feel more comfortable expressing yourself online, join our tell all social media sesh when Grrrl, Get Real goes LIVE for our fourth episode of #GrrrlsNightIn🪩🍸💕 TONIGHT on Instagram at 8:00PM EST with Miya Ingram! Now go and be great you lil grrrly pop! TTYL!