#HEYGRRRLFRENNNS Wow, wow, wow, wow! Words can not describe how crazy the last couple of weeks have been for me at Get Real Inc! Last week, when we spoke, I couldn’t help but tell you grrrls about the super good vibes that I have been feeling lately. This week, I am happy to report that there is still a lot more positivity to go around! I finally feel like I am in a space where it is all starting to make sense and I think I can mostly attribute that to the fact that I am finally giving myself permission to live according to my own rules, wants, and desires. That’s right, I’m straight up ignoring the pressure to go with the flow, and riding my own wave! Going with the flow has quite literally become the norm in today’s world. On one hand, I get it, you don’t want to get your panties in bunch at every little thing but on the other hand I’m like there are several important questions that need to be answered before I float the flow. Like whose flow is it? Where is the flow going? Can we stop and get fries on the way? Without the appropriate answers to those questions the idea of “going with the flow” just kinda sounds like code for shrinking and silencing yourself to maintain peace. In light of that, I would like to propose an addendum to the flow. Thou shalt not go with just any flow, thou shalt create thy own!

Losing Your Mojo

I always try to make space to emphasize the importance of individuality. You are not meant to be like anyone other than yourself, and the best part about that is that your uniqueness is your superpower. Sure we can all technically do the same thing, but no one will be able to do it like you can. This is why I kinda have beef with the whole go with the flow thing because what if I don’t want to? I will never forget when I was working in good ol’ corporate America fresh out of college, and my boss pulled me into his office to have a “chat”. Naturally, I thought I was going to be fired for being perpetually late for work but the conversation we had that day was completely unexpected and is one that I will never forget. Long story short, he told me that I was an exceptional employee (duh) with a lot of potential to be successful (double duh) but he wanted me to, his words not mine, “start sipping the kool-aid”. Oh, Yeaaah! I understood what he was saying, he wanted me to play the role of the cog in the corporate machine. Clock in, type, type, type, email here, phone call there, clock out, easy enough! But looking back on it, it was more like an HR appropriate way for him to say “please be less like yourself!” Fake laugh at my seriously unfunny jokes, make small talk about your coworker’s pet’s birthday parties, and remember to fill the printer with fresh ink if it’s low… you know stuff that I naturally would never think of doing. As I am tapping back into my own energy, I am starting to remember little things like that that would chip away at my individuality and make me feel uncomfortable living authentically. Not to get too deep, too early in the blog post but traditionally speaking what is usually in that cup of kool-aid someone else is pressuring you to drink? It is not a coincidence that it’s killing your individuality. I say this to make the point that it is not your fault if you feel like you’ve lost your mojo, but becoming aware that is gone and the situations that took it away is the first step to reclaiming it!

Getting Your Groove Back

For your daily dose of radical ideas, I would like you to consider the possibility that we are all energetic beings who emit frequencies, which is why when you are not in alignment with your authentic self, you may feel off balance or even uncomfortable. It’s like a radio! For example, if you were born to blast the latest country hits on Q108.9 Giddy Up Grrrl Radio, but you are tuned into someone else’s Power 99.4 Gospel Grrrl Radio frequencies, you are never going to actualize your rhinestone cowgrrrl fantasies. Not until you tune back into your own frequency and start grooving to the beat of your own music! The easiest way to do this, is to ask yourself what your motive for doing things is and trying to gain a clearer understanding of WHO you are doing things for. For example, if your parents gave you really pretty gold hoops for Hanukkah but then your best friend told you that you couldn’t wear them because gold hoops were her thing did you stop wearing them because YOU wanted to or because you wanted to appease your friend? Not grool! Be intentional with your actions and prioritize your own pleasure. Anyone that makes you feel like you’re less than or weird about being yourself should not get an all access pass to your life. The more you are able to tune out their negative frequencies the better you will be able to hear your own and the easier it will be to feel comfortable going with your own flow.

Doing Your Thang

Now comes the fun part, learning to stop repressing yourself and allowing for more opportunities to express yourself! If you are a recovering overthinker, a people pleaser, or just a shy grrrly, this part may be a bit difficult, but we can do hard things, especially if it allows us to feel freer. I always suggest starting small in these situations because it’s very low risk but you are still moving forward. Find realistic and manageable ways to start expressing yourself more. When I made a greater effort to express myself, I started by simply forming opinions. What do I like? What don’t I like? What do I think about the world around me? It helped me to build a stronger relationship with myself because I was creating the space to explore myself and also I was finding new things to express. Another underrated avenue of self-expression is fashion. A good outfit is worth a thousand words! You can say soo much without saying anything at all, which is truly iconic. Feeling expensive?? Something New! Feeling sad? Something blue! Feeling nostalgic? Something old! Feeling like your friend better let you borrow her new top? Something borrowed! The possibilities are truly endless when you are living life on your own terms.

One of my favorite stories that my mom tells about me as a child is about when she signed me up for swimming lessons, and on the first day before the class began, I jumped into the pool. No thoughts, absolutely no swimming skills, just vibes. I use it as a reminder to be brave enough to always do what I want and prioritize my own pleasure, even if it seems scary. When I am 205 years old, levitating in the nursing room, I don’t want to look back on life and see a montage of myself playing second fiddle and holding myself back. I want my memory chip to be full of experiences where I took risks, bet on myself, and created a life that I lived authentically and passionately. We all deserve to live life as we see fit. There is a reason why you feel compelled to do certain activities, meet certain people, or say certain things and it’s probably because it will bring you immense joy. I am not talking about the impulsive thoughts to pop all of the air out of bubble wrap, although that does sound incredibly satisfying. I am pushing you grrrls to think bigger! To speak your minds, to live your dreams, and to follow your hearts!! If there is one thing you can be certain about, it’s that you are meant to be you. Have fun tapping into your energy and prioritizing your pleasure, because you are more than deserving of it. Now go and be great you lil grrrly pop! TTYL!