{"id":2793,"date":"2024-11-05T23:20:43","date_gmt":"2024-11-06T04:20:43","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/grrrlgetreal.com\/?p=2793"},"modified":"2024-11-05T23:52:17","modified_gmt":"2024-11-06T04:52:17","slug":"not-here-to-please-how-to-remain-confident-during-the-holidays","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/grrrlgetreal.com\/?p=2793","title":{"rendered":"Not Here to Please: How to Remain Confident During The Holidays"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

#HEYGRRRLFRENNNS<\/mark><\/em> WHY IS IT SOO DARK OUTSIDE? I am not even kidding I started to go to bed at 6:30PM last night and was thiiiiis close to going full sandy cheeks in hibernation, but then I got a family FaceTime call that woke me up and lowkey reminded me that I have a blog to post?? OOPSIE!<\/mark><\/em> Anyways my little grrrly pops, how are we all feeling? This is the first blog post of our little hot grrrl hiatus from #GrrrlsNightIn and I just wanted to do a temper check to see if we’re still cooler than the other side of the pillow. As much as it pained me to announce the hiatus, I did it for our own good!! The bags under my eyes are no longer serving Louis V, it’s more like “losing my grip”, and because we are soo connected I know that if I feel like I could probably fry a quarter pounder with cheese on my brain right now then my grrrls are right there with me ready to serve it up with a side of fries. Plus, as much as we have become such a close knit community of grrrls supporting grrrls, the holidays are intended to be a time where you make space and time to reconnect with you and yours aka whatever the word family looks like to you! I’m sure the holiday invites are popping up everywhere for you grrrls and your mind is already focused on festive decorations, cozy vibes, and reconnecting with people, places, and things from your past. Uh-Oh. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Did you forget that the holidays are about warmth, gratitude, and bumping into annoying people who haven’t seen you in ages? You know the ones I\u2019m talking about! Old high school classmates who still think you\u2019re a shy grrrl, that one ex who didn\u2019t believe you would ever glow up, and distant relatives who like to comment on every little thing about you, from your career choices to your seemingly permanent single status. Let a grrrl LIVE!<\/mark><\/em> Well, I for one did NOT forget and this year I did not come to play! There\u2019s no point in pouring soo much blood, sweat, and tears into our radical self-care journey only to let outdated expectations and people who think they know us pull us all the way back to square one. We have been working hard for TEN MONTHS! Which means that we have come too far to go back now. In calendar talk, we are almost at the finish line and in real talk you must be CRAZY if you think that I will ever go back to playing it small and dimming my light. So this week, we are going to go over a survival guide for the grrrlies so that you can walking into these holiday gatherings like the radical self-care super star that I know you are! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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out like a light\u270c\ud83c\udffe\u270c\ud83c\udffe\u270c\ud83c\udffe<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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Main Character Energy Only<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Walking into a holiday gathering where everyone knows a past version of you can feel like you\u2019re starring in a reboot of your own life. It\u2019s a surreal experience that can stir up emotions you thought you\u2019d left behind, from self-doubt to the urge to people-please, but instead we are going to change the channel and give them something new to watch. Lights, Camera, ACTION!<\/mark><\/em> Before even stepping into that room, take a moment to ground yourself in the present. My little sister always reminds me to “be where my feet are” and I love that advice! Not just because I am usually wearing really cute shoes, but because it helps me to stay present. It helps you separate the things that are happening RIGHT NOW versus the things that you are bracing yourself for or something that has already happened that is out of your control. While you are grounding yourself, think of all the growth you\u2019ve achieved, and not as something to prove to others, but as something that fuels your own sense of peace and confidence. No one knows you better than you! So even the small things that nobody else would understand that mean a lot to you are moments that are going to help you recenter. Remember, this is for you not for them so who cares if it doesn’t make sense? A simple practice could be taking a deep breath and acknowledging where you are now, especially if nerves are creeping in. Think of a mantra or affirmation that centers you in this version of yourself: \u201cI am worthy of my growth,\u201d \u201cI am rooted in my journey,\u201d or even something as simple as \u201cI\u2019m enough.\u201d These reminders aren\u2019t about validation; they\u2019re about holding space for the person you are now, rather than the person people may expect. Let\u2019s say you\u2019re cornered by someone who still thinks you\u2019re living the same life from five years ago\u2014they ask about your career, love life, or opinions on things you\u2019ve outgrown. Instead of feeling pressured to justify every choice, reconnect with that inner anchor, and let it guide you. For example, if you\u2019ve stepped into a more creative, fulfilling role since then, say so without hesitation. Or if you\u2019ve redefined what success means for you, don\u2019t feel the need to explain away the journey. You\u2019re not here to be understood by everyone, and it\u2019s okay if some people don\u2019t \u201cget\u201d it. This season, give yourself the space to be seen as you are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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“so, how’s the job search coming?”\ud83d\ude2d\ud83d\ude2d\ud83d\ude2d<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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Boundaries Are the New Black<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Family gatherings tend to come with those special \u201ctraditions\u201d of poking, prodding, and unsolicited advice, often veiled in questions that somehow leave you both rattled and rolling your eyes. If Aunt Sharon always brings up your dating life, or if that one cousin seems to thrive on debating every decision you\u2019ve made, it\u2019s time to stand your ground. Setting boundaries is one of the strongest acts of self-care, and it doesn\u2019t make you the \u201cbad grrrl.\u201d It makes you the protector of your peace. For instance, try using simple, polite responses like, \u201cI\u2019m happy with where I am, let\u2019s focus on the good stuff,\u201d or, \u201cI\u2019m choosing to keep some things private\u2014thanks for understanding.\u201d These are all family friendly ways of saying oooommmmmggggg STTTTTTFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU respectfully. But obviously sometimes, boundaries can be a bit more nuanced than a single response, or a random string of abbreviations that are actually coded curse words. LOL YOLO! <\/mark><\/em>For example, if the environment becomes too overwhelming, excuse yourself and take a walk or head to a quieter space. These gatherings don\u2019t need to be a test of endurance. You are not auditioning for survivor, or fear factor, there is no need to place yourself in extreme environments to test your limits. If things get too intense, remind yourself that stepping out or saying \u201cno\u201d isn\u2019t rude; it\u2019s necessary. Think of boundaries as your inner GPS. If someone swerves into uncomfortable territory, you\u2019ve got the map to steer yourself right back to peace. And remember, boundaries aren\u2019t about putting up walls, they\u2019re about creating healthy guidelines that let you interact with others without sacrificing your well being or ruining the family meal before the turkey is served.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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my small talk strategy \ud83c\udf57\ud83d\udc95\u2728<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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Hello, My Name Is<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Now comes the best part: showing up fully as the person you\u2019ve become. It\u2019s natural to feel a bit hesitant, especially when you know certain people only see you through the lens of who you were years ago. But this season, think of every encounter as an opportunity to reintroduce yourself. For example, if you\u2019ve developed a passion for wellness or mental health, bring it up in conversations. If your career has shifted, talk about it with pride. Sometimes the most powerful statement isn\u2019t in explaining how you\u2019ve changed but in confidently embodying it. Walk the walk grrrl!<\/mark><\/em> For instance, if you\u2019ve become someone who prioritizes self-care, make that a natural part of your interactions. Say yes to the things you enjoy, and politely decline the rest. Imagine someone from the past noticing your newfound confidence or self-respect\u2014it may surprise them, and that\u2019s okay. You\u2019re not here to make everyone comfortable; you\u2019re here to be true to yourself. If they\u2019re curious, let them be curious. The more that I grow, the more that I have learned I actually value privacy. Not everyone needs to know every little thing about what you are going through all the time. Not in a mean way, or that people aren’t interested, I’m sure you’re a lovely grrrl! But there is something soo satisfying about fostering a personal connection with yourself. This bond you’re building is unbreakable and it’s as private as you want it to be. You\u2019re not shrinking to fit into their outdated perceptions, nor are you embellishing to gain their approval. You\u2019re simply allowing them to see your authentic self, no edits or filters. The more you lean into this, the more comfortable it becomes, until embodying your truth feels as natural as breathing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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yes, i’ve changed. and what about it??\ud83d\udc85\ud83c\udffe\ud83d\udc95\u2728<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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As you step into holiday gatherings this year, remember that the work you\u2019ve put into your radical self-care journey and personal growth deserves to be honored, especially in spaces where people may only see echoes of the past. You\u2019re not just carrying forward the experiences you\u2019ve lived through; you\u2019re also carrying forward your resilience, self-awareness, and the joy of living authentically. Each interaction can be a reminder of who you are now, not as a performance or a statement, but simply as a reflection of the journey you\u2019ve embraced. When others struggle to understand this version of you, remind yourself that their perception isn\u2019t a reflection of your growth.<\/mark><\/strong> If they question, press, or act surprised, that\u2019s simply a sign of your evolution and a sign that you\u2019re moving in the right direction. Choose to surround yourself with people who celebrate your progress and understand that authenticity doesn\u2019t need approval. Hold onto your boundaries and don\u2019t feel the need to explain every step of your path. Trust that being yourself is enough, that your growth is a gift worth honoring, and that staying true is always worth it. This holiday season, let gratitude be a thankfulness for the journey and a love for the person you are becoming. You deserve to be both fully seen and fully respected.Now go and be great you lil grrrly pop! TTYL!\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Byeeee baby gorgeous! \ud83d\udc8b\ud83d\udc8b\ud83d\udc8b<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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PRESS PLAY AND SLAY<\/strong> \ud83d\udc85\ud83c\udffe<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Hey grrrly pop! Ready to restart your radical self-care journey? Then you\u2019re gonna need some poppin background music. Every blog post comes paired with a playlist, so don\u2019t forget to check out this week\u2019s #MoodMusic that will put you back in the groove to reach your goals!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The weekly playlists are curated to elevate your vibe and motivate your inner baddie! Listen and follow @GRRRLGETREAL on all of your favorite social platforms for more radical content \u2728<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Listen now<\/a><\/div>\n\n\n\n
Follow us<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n
<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

#HEYGRRRLFRENNNS WHY IS IT SOO DARK OUTSIDE? 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